Story of teh Day 4/ 4/ 2014 - Part 2

When I last wrote, I had been rendered unable to sleep due to the comforting- I mean very UN-comforting letter from the State of Indiana.

Being unable to sleep has certain benefits.
It gives you a chance to have another slice of the chocolate cake in the refrigerator.
Before someone else finishes it.
It allows you to reconsider every major thing you have done in the last quarter century.
If your memory is better than mine, you can make that half-century.
And it allows you to formulate your response to the IRS. ( Or whatever the state level tax people are called.)



Dear Sir/ Ma’am,

Yesterday, we received a notice from your department that there was an inconsistency in our tax return- it did not agree with your figures. According to you, we now owe over $xxxxx in taxes.

The item you say we incorrectly took, as a credit, is the money withheld from L’s paycheck by his employer to pay state income tax. The amount we took as a credit is the amount shown on his W2. We have enclosed a copy of the W2. We are not concerned that it was entered on the wrong line since it was automatically downloaded and entered by TurboTax, and having them do those things is what makes paying the $49 for the program worth it.

There are 3 possible reasons that your calculations and ours do not match:

1. You did not credit us for the money paid to the state by his employer.
2. You or his employer mistakenly applied the money paid to someone else, possibly because of an error by the state or by the employer in the social security number.
3. L’s employer deducted the money from his pay, but did not send it on to the State.

None of these situations has been caused by an error or omission on our part, and we have submitted our tax returns using the information given to us by L’s employer.

Sincerely,
a disgruntled taxpayer****


Okay, I did not sign it that way, but I was tempted.

Story of the day 4/ 4/ 2014

It is 12:06 AM.
Friday morning, although, it is only technically morning, since the sun won't rise for many hours.
I have been to bed.
The problem is that it didn't last very long, my being in bed.

I got home from work at about 10:46 PM.
I checked my email and my cell phone.
I had to check my cell phone because I had accidentally left it at home when I went off to work.
This was especially stupid of me because I drive home alone at night and it is nice to have that little bit of security- a cell phone to use in case of a flat tire or some other mishap.

At any rate, I checked it and found my cousin had called 3 times in 20 minutes.
And had not left a message.
There were no texts.
In other words, I hadn't missed much.
My email was similarly not stressful. A couple of short emails from friends.

So, I started going through my regular bedtime routine.
I took my pills, the stuff that keeps my joints from making loud creaking noises and the pink pills that keep me from having an asthma attack.
I checked to see if the laundery I had thrown into the machine before I left the house was done, or if it was still damp.
Then I went to get ready for bed, to brush my teeth and to put on my cookie monster pajamas.
Okay, I lied. I am actually wearing plaid, tonight, because cookie monster is in the dryer.

That is when I found it.
The unpleasant note that my husband had left me.

My husband is not unpleasant.
The note was.

I need to exlain.
My husband and I are those two ships that pass in the night, except, we are usually in two cars passing as he pulls in from work and I head out.
We do this twice a week, because that is how our Tuesday and Thrsday schedules work.
As a result, our communications on those days are largely via notes left on the bathroom mirror.
Often they say things like, "Do you want me to set the alarm for 7:15 or 7:30?"
Because I carpool, but not every day, there is often some confusion as to how early i need to leave the house, and the 15 minute adjustment is reflected in this.

Or it will say, " Dinner was delicious."
When it says that, I either have to worry that he needs me to do a favor for him,
or he is eating something that came frozen-ready-made.

Sometiems it will say that our son called, or some other thing that he or I missed.

But , tonight's note was unpleasant.

It was unpleasant because, today, we had a piece of mail .
From the State of Indiana.
From the Department of Revenue of the State of Indiana.
About our state income tax.

I filed, some weeks ago, for our refund.

They did get it.
But they do not like it.
They didn't like our tax return.
Apparently, they reviewed it and found that we had inappropriately claimed a credit that we did not deserve.
As a result, we owe the state several thousands of dollars.
Payable in the next two weeks.

They are willing to accept a charge card.

I read the details.
I check each line that they have reviewed.
I fnd the error.
They say it is Schedule 5.
We have, according to them, no credits from Schedule 5, despite the fact that we claimed them.

I did our taxes.
In other words, I have messed up, somehow.
Although, for such a large mount?
Even I am not that stupid.

I go back to the computer in my not-cookie-monster pajamas.

I open up the tax file.
Fortunatly, I still remember the password.

I locate Schedule 5.
Scheduel 5 is the information taken directly from my husband's W2 form.
I didn't even type it in, Turbo Tax downloaded that info from the internet.

It is not some error I have made, it is information from his employer.
But, according to the State of Indiana , my husband did not have state income taxe withheld from his pay. Either that or it was withheld, but not given over to the state.
I am not totally sure what to think.

My first thought is that we ned to xerox his W2, and submit it with an appeal.
Obviously, some idiot at the State misread his W2 form.

But then I start to wonder if his employer didn't actually send the withheld money to the State.
I mean, it could have been embezzled- stolen.
This seems like a rather neurotic thought except that the last time we had an unpleasant series of letters from the tax people ( that time being the federal ones) it was because someone where I work
- well, where I had previously worked-
had used my identy to steal money and claim I had earned it and owed taxes on it.

We have also, about 17 years ago, been the victims of actual embezzlement.
Also perpetrated by someone from work.
So, I am neurotic, but not without reason.

I wrote out a note to my husband explaining where the "error" was,
and what we needed to do about xeroxing the W2;
and I taped it up on the bathroom mirror next to the note my husband had left for me.
And I went to bed.

I lay down.
I put my head on the pillow, and closed my eyes.

That was about 15 minutes ago.
15 very long minutes of wondering what will happen , next.

Story of the Day 4/ 13/ 2014

Passover is coming.
I know it because my house smells like bleach, and that weird smell from when I run the self clean cycle on the oven.
There are also scads of things pulled from cabinets or being put into them.

I can also tell because Sarah has texted me from Wegmans.
Sarah is at college in Rochester, New York. She lives in a dorm.

During the school, year she survives by eating vegetarian and salad bar selections from the cafeteria, and by having stockpile of Cheerios and Madras Lentil packets in her dorm room.

But with Passover coming, she cannot eat anything from the cafeterias, not even the lettuce from the salad bar, so she is scrambling.

There is a convenience store in the basement of the dorms. They had some grape juice and some matzoh, and macaroons.
They also have apples.

Okay, that is a start, just not a very good one, so she has grabbed her roommate to serve as a pack mule (hey, one kid can only carry so much), and they have taken the bus to Wegmans, which is the local grocery store.

The first text is a sad one.
Wegmans is out of Temp Tee.
This would be a bigger tragedy, except that Sarah is Jewish, and she started panicking about food about 2 weeks ago, and bought a few at that foray to Wegmans.
She would have bought more, but the expiration date had her panicked that the Temp Tee would spoil before the middle of the Passover holiday.

I texted her to check out the Philadelphia cream cheese.
Temp Tee is this much fancier, whipped and kosher for Passover item that we love, but Philadelphia will do, if you cannot get Temp Tee. Philadelphia brand cream cheese comes , regular year, with no certification for Passover, but starting about a week before the holiday, specially marked packages of it start showing up in all of the refrigerator cases in the various grocery stores. God Bless Kraft!

Another text, she has found it , but it isn’t marked kosher for Passover.

Since I am doing my Passover shopping, as well, I hurry to the refrigerator aisle at Marsh.
I locate the Passover Philadelphia cream cheese, and text her where the heksher ( kosher mark) is for Passover.
This year it is hidden on the side of the box, although, larger than it was, last year.
She finds it.

Then she texts me and asks what kasha is.
Kasha is what people who do not know how to say my name call me.
I am not joking.
I also do not usually bother to correct them.
They think I am a food.
Oh well.

It is also this really weird thing that Ashkenazic Jews make and serve mixed in with bow tie noodles.
It is rather disgusting, except to them. They seem to like it.
While I am not totally sure what it is I know it is chametz- it is a grain product and not okay for Passover, even if the store employees have stuck it in the Passover section.
I text back to her that it is not okay for Passover.

I do not explain that some people call me that.
Sarah is deaf, it would make no sense to her.

Several texts later, my cell phone falls silent, and I figure she is doing better.
I go home.
Much later, we Skype and Sarah tells me what happened at the store.
After she checked out.

Sarah and her roommate were outside the store at the bench waiting for the bus. Sarah was rearranging her groceries, moving things from bag to backpack. She pulls out the spaghetti sauce- and it goes flying up and out of her hands.

It misses hitting a man, but explodes onto the cement.

Sarah is aghast. She is a bit embarrassed, and she is also crushed.
That was her one jar of spaghetti sauce- meant to last her all of Passover.
She starts to pick up some of the larger pieces of glass.

A man comes over and talks to her. She gestures thats she is deaf.
He tells her to leave it; he will get someone to clean it up.
A man in uniform comes out and starts to clean it up.
A third man, in a nice shirt and tie, who also works for the store, comes out. He tells Sarah not to pick up the glass; they will take care of it.
He explains where she can wash her hands.
Other customers see the red stain and steer clear.
The man, with the tie, picks up the label – the piece of glass with the label from the sauce and goes back into the store.

Sarah’s roommate spots a man they know, a teacher at the college, headed into the store. He is with his son who is wearing an orange baseball cap. She wants to get their attention, but Sarah tells her they are too far away. Sarah tells her just to let the guy know they saw him at the store- him and his son with the orange cap.

Two women come over they are dressed nicely. One is white and one is black and they are in their 40’s.
They ask the girls, in ASL, if they are coming to the program, tomorrow.
The Program?
It is something about Jesus.
Sarah smiles and takes the invitation. She explains to me that saying "No" would have started them off on a roll, and she would prefer to avoid it.
While we are Skyping, she shows me the invitation, which is a tad comical.
It announces that "Yes, even those Deafies can be saved", they have an interpreter just for them!

I am not kidding.

At any rate, as the women turn to leave one of them remarks that she saw them talking about boys.
She winks at them.
They were, about the teacher’s son and the orange cap, but, obviously, not in the wink-wink way that the woman meant.
Obviously, her comprehension of sign language leaves a bit to be desired.

Then, from across the parking lot, the father of the boy with the orange cap spots them- waves big and comes over and says “Hi!"

And just after that, the man with the tie, reappears.
He has looked and looked and can’t find the brand of sauce that Sarah broke.

Sarah gestures for a pad of paper. She writes down that it was from the Passover section.
He puts his palm to his forehead- “Oh!”
He runs back into the store, finds the Passover sauce and brings her a jar.

Sarah is a mite embarrassed, after all, her clumsiness broke it, but she is happy to have the jar, so that she will not starve.

Well, whatever it is that happens when you do not have a jar of spaghetti sauce on Passover.

Story of the Day 3/ 25/ 2014

So, My saga of the phone bill continues.
The T-Mobile bill, to be exact.

Today, I received notice that our bill is overdue and we are about to have a $20 fee imposed upon us.
The notice, of course, came in the form of a text.

This is the same form in which T-Mobile has been informing me of all sorts of fanciful things, like the month they erroneously dunned my charge card for over $1000.

Come to think of it, they still have my $1,000. The same money that they were supposed to refund to me.
But haven't.
I know this, because I asked my husband to check, on line.

So, they have a thousand dollars that they took from our charge card to pay a bill of $119.
They were supposed to refund us the money.
They didn't.
And now they are claiming our bill is overdue and they want to charge us another $20.

Of course, I call them.
They did refund the money.
"You did not."
They check.
Oh , gee, they didn't.
Their refund to us bounced.

It bounced?
How can a refund bounce? A refund to a charge card......

It bounced.

If my check to them had bounced, they would charge me $30.
Because their refund to me bounced, they are charging me $20 as a late fee.

What?

The woman agreed that it didn't look like it made sense, but it did.
She tried to explain it to me.
She wanted me to pay an extra $239 with my charge card to avoid the $20 late charge, and to avoid having our service discontinued.
And I could wait for the bounced $1,000 of ours that they had already been paid to be refunded to us.

For some strange reason , this did not sound good to me.
Even though the woman thought it made good sense.

I told her that I would pay .
After the refund was made, and after I saw it on my charge card account.

At this point, she offered to put a ten day hold on our account.
We would not be assessed the late fee, nor have our service cut off.
And our refund would appear on our credit card statement.
And then we could call in and authorize another charge on our card.

This sounded reasonable.

Almost.

In the meanwhile, they still have our $1,000.

Nothing from them is likely to sound very reasonable until they refund it.

Story of the Day 3/17/2014

This story started about 5 week sago.
I could check for the exact date, if you would like.
Personally, I do better when the details are less fresh in my mind. There is less to be angry about.

It started with a text.

Many stories start with texts, but a lot of them are not re-tellable.

This one is.

Barely.

We have a cell phone plan. When I grew up, there was no such thing.
No cell phone plan, no cell phones except in Maxwell Smart's shoe.
If you have no idea who Maxwell Smart is, you obviously do not pre-date cell phones.
As for Maxwell Smart's shoe phone, that must have ended up causing lot of butt-dialing. I mean foot dialing, but the writers for the show didn't deal with cell phones in their real lives, so buttt dialing had yet to be discovered.
But back to our cell phone plan.

We have 5 of them. Five cell phones and one plan.
We've had the same service provider for years. I think since 1998, which makes us almost unheard of.
Customer loyalty went out before cell phone plans were invented.
Back in 1998, we had one cell phone- my husband's. He used it for work, for when he was on call.
Back in the Deark Ages of 1998, I thought that perhaps, some day, I would have a cell phone, but I had no way of envisioning every 2 year old in the country with a fully armed...whoops, APPed smart phone addictedly playing Angry Birds or whatever that age range is into.

Now we have 5 fully functioning phones on our plan with this very same company.
It is not that we love this company so much that we do not want to be lured away.
In fact, there are moments we despise this company.
There are moments when saying "T-Mobile" is tantamount to uttering a swear word.
We've had no end of problems with them, although, the problems seem to come at 2 year intervals, allowing us to be lulled into thinking that the company has improved.
Until the next big problem.

Since the last big problem had been about 26 months ago, I should have been prepared.
But I wasn't.

I got a text.
I get one , every month, letting me know that our checking account has been raided to pay for our monthly service plan of $119 dollars.
Okay, actually, letting me know that our charge card has been dinged for that amount.
That is a lot of money, although, for 5 phone with unlimited talk and text ( the text part being the important part, since most of our kids don't hear) it is not a bad deal.

But, this time, the text was a little different.

Someone had added a zero before the decimal point.

T-Mobil had apparently taken over $1,000 from our checking account.

Two phone calls later, I was told that they had erred.
They had even figured out how they had made the mistake and were very sorry, and that the charge card account had not yet been charged.
And this would be corrected before the amount was actually deducted.

Except that it wasn't.
It wasn't corrected- a fact I found out about a few weeks later.

Another two phone calls later, they admitted that a mistake had been made.

Yes, the same phrase as when I had originally called them.
But this was not for the first mistake, this phrase was uttered in response ego the second mistake.
And, while they could not put the money back into our checking account, or send us the difference, they would gladly credit it to our account.
Not to our charge card account, the one we had to pay the $1,030 to NOW or risk fees and interest, but to our T-Mobile account.

The woman from T-Mobile explained that it would be nice for us to have that balance. We wouldn't' have to pay any T-Mobile bills for a while.

I snidely commented that I did not feel that they were entitled to hold onto close to $1000 of our money for that many months without paying us interest and a fee for the inconvenience.

This elicited silence.
And then the response that they could not help me.

This did not sit well with me.
I asked the woman if she would be happy if they held onto her money for that long.
This did not get a response.

I asked to speak with supervisor, a manager, someone who was old enough to have to pay their own charge card bills.

After a bit more struggle to get them to understand why I did not think that they should just hold onto our money, it was determined that hey could actually refund the difference to our charge card.
despite the fact that they had previously told me that this would be impossible.

of course, we used to think that 2 years olds having their own cell phones was impossible.

Meanwhile, I am waiting, and cringing, for my next text from T-Mobile.